Friday 27 January 2012


THE TRUTH ABOUT DEATHTRAP DUNGEON

Perhaps you read Ian Livingstone's 'fighting fantasy' gamebook Deathtrap Dungeon as a child. Perhaps you have children reading it.

STOP. This book is not an entertaining sword and sorcery adventure. It is a sordid tale of oriental sex tourism, designed to brainwash you or the people you love into buying a ticket to the Far East and renting men in dresses.

This book was created by a pair of European perverts, hoping to entice children into a godless lifestyle of transexual prostition.

 
You have been warned. If this book is in your home, burn it now. Burn it and pray to the lord for forgiveness. 

If you know a young man who is reading this gamebook, it may not be too late for him. You still have a chance to turn him away from subliminal desires to hire transexual prostitutes.


 Ian Livingstone and Steve Jackson, I am unveiling the hidden themes of your disgusting sexual porn book.
Your adventure ends here.



THAILAND - THE BOOK'S SORDID SECRET LOCATION

 If we examine the 'Background' section of this perverted sex manual, we find tell-tale signs that the story is set in Thailand - the world capital of sex tourism. Hundreds of thousands of men travel to this country each year, hoping to indulge their lust for girls, boys or something in between.
 This section begins:

Despite it's name, Fang was an ordinary small town in the northern province of Chiang Mai. Situated on the banks of the River Kok it made a convenient stopover for river traders and passengers throughout most of the year.

Surely these are just invented fantasy locations, like Narnia or Middle Earth? Let's see what Wikipedia says:

Fang is a district in the Northern Part of Chiangmai province, northern Thailand.

Chiangmai is the second largest province of Thailand, located in the northern part of the country.

The Kok River originates in the Daen Lao Range, Shan State, Burma. It flows down and across the Burma-Thailand border...

It's clear that these names come from the godless, free-love nation of Thailand. No doubt these locations are familiar to Livingstone and Jackson from their runs to Asia to satiate their perversions.

The titular dungeon is owned by one Baron Sukumvit, whose moniker clearly comes from Sukhumvit Road, a major highway in Thailand. It's Thai name, Thanon Sukhumwit, is even closer.

There are several other clues that show the gamebook takes place in Asia:
- "a small man with slanted eyes" appears in the characters bedroom, likely for some nefarious purpose.
- You are handed a "bamboo stick" at the beginning of the dungeon.
- One of the contestants is a ninja.
- Two of the contestants are Asian stereotypes of white men: identical looking giant 'barbarians'
- The statue in the picture on page 36 resembles a buddhist statue.



'THE WALK' AND 'TRAPS'

The book states that Deathtrap Dungeon is sometimes referred to as "The Walk." This is clearly a reference to Walking Street.

Wikipedia says:

Walking Street is part of the city of Pattaya, Thailand. It is a tourist attraction that draws foreigners and Thai nationals, primarliy for the night life. It is a red-light district with many go-go bars and brothels.

And what about the dungeon's many 'traps'? They're right there in the title. More naive readers may think these refer simply to rolling boulders and dart-shooting walls, like some wholesome Indiana Jones style adventure.

Luckily, in my life-quest to protect Christian families, I have accustomed myself with the slang used by the young people on the streets.

The "Urban Dictionary" is a internet compendium of such slang. It states: (More sensitive readers may want to prepare themselves)

Trap: A man who dresses like a woman and is somewhat feminine in appearance. Could almost be mistaken for a woman until you are in the bedroom with one.

That's right, readers. Please give yourself a moment for the full meaning of this information to sink in.

Remember, I have written this not to traumatize you, but simply to protect the innocent from some of the dangers of our sick modern world.

Let us continue.

By now, the truth should be becoming obvious. Ian Livingstone, and his partner in crime Steve Jackson, have created this book in order to suck Christians into a world of atheist asian sex tourism.

This is a book in which our children travel are invited to do "the walk" down a Thailands main red-light district, keeping out a keen eye for Traps - ladyboy hookers.

In fact, in one illustration in the book, you can clearly see a long snake-like object emerging from what at first appears to be a beautiful woman. This book is anything but subtle.

 Misters Livingstone and Jackson, I am disgusted. America is disgusted. Jesus is digusted. We hope you enjoy writing your filthy books in hell.



THE PERVERTS RESPONSIBLE

The two men putting filthy subtexts in your child's reading are Ian Livingstone and Steve Jackson. Although the gamebook series was created by the two men, Deathtrap Dungeon, the sixth in the series was written by Livingstone alone. No doubt these two men are well-known to the Thai police.

Livingstone was possibly the inspiration for Mr Grady, the child-murderer from The Shining.


       Ian Livingstone                      The Shining's Mr Grady


Thank you for reading The Truth About Deathtrap Dungeon.

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